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DEAR CAROLYN: I have recently become engaged to a wonderful guy and we are planning to move in together.``Joe'' has two cats that he is absolutely crazy about, and I knew were a non-negotiable item early on in the relationship. I've never had cats, never liked them, never wanted them, but I would never ask Joe to give them up. However, I have asked that we designate our bedroom a cat-free zone. The trouble is, Joe says most of the pleasure he derives from owning cats comes from having them sleep with him. I don't think it's fair that I be awakened several times nightly because I am being stepped on. I feel I am already making a compromise for Joe regarding the cats, and I don't think my request is all that unreasonable. Is it?
DEAR MEOW: Joe wants to sleep with his cats; you want to sleep. That suggests Joe is arguing for a luxury over your basic need, which would make Joe the unreasonable one. If reasonableness applied here. It doesn't. It's about priorities. If it's worth it to Joe to put you through hell so he can sleep with his cats, that's his call. If you'd rather be with Joe than feel rested and loved, that's your call. And if you move in hoping Joe will change his mind, then ``unreasonable'' would finally fit
You've made your bed now lay in it...with those two adorable cats.